Lost In Your Eyes
by bertiebert
Summary: Matthew has no doubt in his mind that Ivan loves him, but the physical aspect of their relationship is still uncharted territory. He's not sure how Ivan will act when they finally end up in bed together. M - RusCan - Human names


**This was a fill for the Hetalia Kink Meme request: Russia/Any - Russia is surprisingly gentle. I adore Russia/Canada and so this was born. Now, I totally get where everyone gets the "Russia is evil and bad and doesn't deserve love" thing, but I think he's just misunderstood and lonely. Even Russia deserves some love every now and then, so I decided to give him some in the form of Canada (because he's cute). Enjoy!**

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><p><em><strong>Lost In Your Eyes<strong>_

There was no doubt in Matthew's mind that Ivan loved him. He knew the tall Russian cared deeply for him, but there was always a part of his brain that told him the love may only go so far. There was no way to know how the physical aspect of their relationship would play out until they tried.

When Ivan arrived in Quebec after a nine-hour flight from Moscow, Matthew was practically vibrating with excitement. He took Ivan's bags and sat them at their feet, practically launching himself into Ivan's arms in an uncharacteristic display of emotion. Ivan laughed, hugging the Canadian close and delighting in the fact that Matthew was in his arms again. He kissed Matthew when the younger man leaned back, also situating him in his strong arms. Ivan turned with Matthew in his arms, pressing the smaller man up against the front door. Matthew made a small squeak in surprise, but Ivan swallowed it and delved into the wet heat of his mouth. He wasn't deterred when the Canadian pulled away to breathe; his mouth just latched onto Matthew's pale neck and left several marks before any words were spoken.

"God, I missed you," Matthew panted, his fingers carding through the Russian's silvery hair. "I'm so glad you're here."

Ivan hummed in agreement, suckling more forcefully on Matthew's pulse point and making the younger nation moan unabashedly. Their kisses grew more passionate and less tender. Soon they were in Matthew's bedroom, pulling at each other's clothes in their haste to get to bare skin. Matthew was pressed into his mattress, Ivan's weight pinning him down as he was kissed breathless. Ivan's shirt was still on, but unbuttoned, and Matthew's jeans were around his thighs. They touched any skin they could find without their sight, their lips moving in perfect synchronization. It hadn't taken long for the pair to learn just about everything about their lover and it came in handy quite often.

"Do you want to continue, Matvey? You haven't allowed me this far before," Ivan implored, peppering kisses across Matthew's shoulders.

Matthew fell silent, his head spinning from lack of oxygen and his brain turning over the idea of having sex with Ivan. _He's never hurt me before, why would he hurt me during sex? He's always so gentle and careful with me so he wouldn't change just because we're…_

Being jolted out of his thoughts by a warm hand settling on his hip, Matthew looked up into violet eyes that held nothing but adoration, love, and concern for the younger nation.

"If you do not want to have sex, Matthew, I will not force you. We'll wait until you are ready, I promise, _dorogoi_." Ivan kissed Matthew's forehead and sat back, letting the Canadian follow him.

"No," Matthew said, grabbing Ivan's hand and staring up at him as he shoved down any fear or doubt that tried to form. "I do want to have sex. Really, truly I do. I want you, Ivan, please."

Ivan smiled that devastatingly handsome smile no one but Matthew got to see, and kissed Matthew back down onto the bed. They shed the rest of their clothes until nothing separated them and Matthew could see every inch of Ivan. The man was scarred, to say the least, but they reminded Matthew just how brave the other northern nation had been throughout the years.

At the beginning of their relationship, Matthew had walked in on Ivan changing his shirt and the way Ivan turned his back and cursed at his trembling fingers gave Matthew the boost of confidence and bravery that had him crossing the room to the taller man. He caught Ivan's hands, scarred as well, and kissed them before he caught a glimpse of the other man's chest. Scars covered every inch of the pale skin, criss-crossing and creating all sorts of patterns. The worst was over Ivan's heart that was hammering nervously against his ribcage.

"Stalingrad," Ivan had mumbled, starting when Matthew's warm fingers carefully brushed across the puckered skin.

That day had been spent in front of a fire in Ivan's living room, discussing their pasts and revealing scars to one another. Their relationship was much less rocky after they spilled everything to each other and no secrets could be kept.

Matthew quickly found that Ivan was very experienced in driving him crazy. Those long fingers found each sensitive spot deep inside him, leaving him gasping and calling out Ivan's name. Ivan just smiled, kissing Matthew's cheek and pressing up against his prostate again. It didn't take very long for Matthew to be sweating and begging Ivan to _just take me now._

As soon as Matthew let out a single noise of discomfort, Ivan was still and murmuring soothingly into his ear. He let Matthew relax at his own pace before continuing, but stopped whenever he heard anything that lead him to believe Matthew was in pain. Once Ivan was seated fully inside the Canadian, he settled on his forearms to bring himself closer to Matthew. He pressed soft kisses to Matthew's face, watching as the muscles loosened and a small smile appeared there before Matthew opened his eyes and gazed up at him.

"I'm fine now, _ch__é__ri._ You can move," Matthew assured him, brushing Ivan's hair away from his face.

The young man shivered when Ivan pulled out, gasping when he pushed back in. They figured out a rhythm quickly, a gentle push-pull that had them both whimpering. Matthew's back arched almost violently when Ivan landed a thrust squarely on his prostate.

"Oh, _Ivan_," Matthew purred, his fingers digging into the bigger man's shoulders. "Yes, right there."

Ivan smiled against the skin of Matthew's jaw, leaving a kiss there before he obliged the Canadian.

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><p>Matthew awoke the next morning feeling pleasantly sore and elated. Ivan dozed next to him, looking more childlike than when he was awake, and Matthew lay there for a moment and just watched his lover. The Russian was very tall but he wasn't chubby—just big-boned. Matthew considered him a gentle giant. He found Ivan extremely attractive despite his brother's insistence that there was nothing "cute" about a communist. (Alfred still hadn't figured out that Ivan's country hadn't been communist since the early nineties.) Ivan often expressed how unhappy he was with his body, but Matthew saw nothing wrong with the strong muscles and big stature.<p>

Slipping from the bed carefully, Matthew pulled on his underwear and Ivan's shirt. He buttoned only a few buttons before heading for the kitchen. There he started in on coffee and pancakes. After the activities last night, Matthew was practically ravenous and knew Ivan had to be as well. He was just finishing the first batch of pancakes when a pair of strong arms encircled his waist and tugged him back against a warm body.

"_Bonjour,_" Matthew said, tilting his head back for a kiss.

A kiss that Ivan eagerly gave him. "_Dobroe utro._"

"I've made pancakes. I hope that's okay." Matthew turned in Ivan's arms, resting his hands on Ivan's chest.

"Whatever you make is fine, _vozlyublennyi._" Ivan kissed Matthew's cheek, delighting in the pink color that dusted the Canadian's cheekbones.

As they ate breakfast in comfortable silence and the occasional conversation, Matthew found that he'd never truly felt scared of Ivan. Most of the other nations saw only a bloodthirsty, mentally unstable man that only wanted to hurt people. Matthew got to see the sweet, caring side of Ivan that only came out when they were tucked safely away from prying eyes. He knew that there was never going to be anything to be afraid of.

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><p><em><strong>Translations:<strong>_

_Dorogoi – _darling (Russian)

_Ch__é__ri – _darling (French)

_Bonjour – _good morning/hello (French)

_Dobroe utro – _good morning (Russian)

_Vozlyublennyi – _sweetheart (Russian)


End file.
